Of Mensches and Men

If I ever do find a decent guy and get married (God willing), I want to have lots of children. I want to have boys. Not that I wouldn't love having girls as well, but this world needs all the nice Jewish boys it can get.

Clearly. Because I can't seem to find any.

Men. Is there even such a thing? I question this every day. I prefer to refer to them as 'guys'. This has less of an implication that they are actually mature. It leaves room for interpretation. After a certain age, a male is offended if he is called a 'boy'. Most females, however, never mind being called a 'girl', no matter what her age is.

An old boyfriend used to say that Billy Joel's "Always a Woman" reminded him of me, and I found that flattering in a twisted sort of way. But now, when I think of a 'woman', I picture someone who is voluptous and powerful. I am neither. I am always a girl and at my best, a lady, but never, ever a woman.

Whenever I meet a boy (because I've never met a 'man', much less dated one) and we exchange phone numbers, I never save the number in my mobile. I have learned my lesson too many times of entering, deleting, re-entering and re-deleting the digits. What a hassle! I figure, if he's really interested, he'll call. I can't always put a face to a name, but I can always put a name to an area code.

Often times I wish I were confident and carefree; that the small act of saving a number didn't pose such a threat. At this point, I expect to be dissapointed. I'm used to it.

My parents met under a tree at the University of Miami. The rest is history. I thought my story would be just as simple. I did meet a great love at undergraduate, but not THE great love.

All I know now is that I don't know anything at all.

A good friend and I used to joke around that our fates were sitting together at Starbucks, having a coffee. It's getting old. I live in the epicenter of young Jews and I don't know the first thing about meeting any. Where does one find a decent guy in the city? I can tell you where one DOESN'T: JDATE, my building, DORRIAN'S, or any UES bar for that matter.

I'm not asking for that much, just a mensch that I can take home to Mommy and Daddy. I'm cute and fun. And I'm running out of patience.

Why are all the good girls home with broken hearts?