This year is my golden birthday. I am turning 25 on January 25.
Any birthday is a big birthday in my house, but a milestone birthday that also happens to be my golden birthday? Blowout.
I told my parents that I don't want gifts and requested that they not give me anything. They rolled their eyes.
The truth is, all I want is to be happy. And most days, I think I'm there, but then I have days like yesterday and I am reminded that there is always work to do and improvements to be made. Some of you long-timers may remember what a mess I was this time last year. I never explicitly said it, because for so long I hoped people who read this blog would hold me in some high esteem, but we all know that I'm far from perfect. My state of unhappiness was clear from my writing. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I slept through most meals and dropped 11 pounds in a month. I wasn't myself. This year, I'm content just to be out of that dark place.
Twenty five. I always thought I'd be further along by now. Married. Have a book published. The optimist in me is yelling to celebrate what I do have, which is a lot. Last year, I swore that I wouldn't let myself be single at 25, but that was a naive thought. Promises that can't be kept should never be made.
As for the celebration, I'm really not sure. The plan has been to ignore it and stay home. Maybe my friends will drag me out and we'll toast to the future.
I bought Kate Spade party invitations just in case I change my mind.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: 25 is not old, not even close, not even a bit.
ReplyDeleteAs a fellow overachiever I know how it feels to hold yourself up to unachievable standards and then be supremely disappointed when you don't reach them...but...
You are fabulous -- single or not, published book or not. Don't take yourself so seriously!! :)
xoxo
Oh, honey. I can empathize all too well.
ReplyDelete25 was the worst birthday of my life. I was caught in a dead-end job and a dead-end relationship. I had no money, no sense of purpose, and no idea how to change these things. I finally got through it; it just took time, good friends, good luck, and motivation.
You are too fabulous to let these things get you down. Focus on the things that make you happy, and the things you want out of life.
Happy, happy early birthday. Mine is the 18th. We should sooo celebrate together!
xoxo--
Maybe my 27th (eek) birthday present should be a plane ticket to see you????
ReplyDeleteWhat a great golden birthday to have. Whatever you decide to do, I hope it is a fabulous day!!
ReplyDeleteYOU are too sweet and too special to be feeling this way. Embrace a big happy new year and celebrate how far you've come from your sad sad days... it is going to be a-ok. and I like the optimist in you who purchased the kate spade party cards.. go out and have a blast.. you deserve it xo
ReplyDeleteLove, I hope you have a wonderful birthday. I, too, felt like this at 25, but you know what, you're still young! I'll be 30 this year, and at 25, I just couldn't understand why my life hadn't caught up to the "life plan" I'd made when I was younger. You know finish college by 22, marry college sweetheart at 23, have awesome job by 24, and so on. I didn't even graduate undergrad til I was 24, and married at 23, psssssh I don't think so! I'm so glad my life plan did not work out. I will be 30 this year, and I look back and am so happy my life turned out the way it did. I've done so many things, travelled, met new friends, reconnected with old ones, I was perfectly lonely. You should listen to that John Mayer song. I look back and think how wonderful that time was in my life. Things will happen when they're supposed to. So, enjoy life and parties and friends, and travel and do all the things YOU want to do. Because, once you get in a committed relationship, it's about what WE want to do. It's no longer an "I".
ReplyDeleteChin up=) Hope you feel better and have a fab birthday!
This past year I turned 25. It was the most depressing birthday I had ever had. Like you, I was not where I wanted to be at 25. I have family members that have married and had children very young. They never really had a life of their own. Realizing that, I decided to celebrate me being single. This year, I will be living it up to bring my 26th year!!
ReplyDeleteGo out and celebrate, sweetie! My birthdays have gotten BETTER each year as I've gotten older :) You are purely fabulous...don't forget that ;)
ReplyDeleteNone of this ignoring your birthday nonsense ... you should celebrate every single year of who you are, because you'll never turn 25 again in your life. Cherish it and celebrate it!
ReplyDeleteI turned 27 last Friday, I am not married, or engaged, I have not bought a house or a condo, have not found a career that I am passionate about, BUT I am healthy, have a job, have a wonderful family and friends!!! Do something fun for your day, and put those KS invites to good use!!!
ReplyDeleteYou are so young...plenty of time to get married and write a book! Glad you are back to a happy place -- you deserve it!
ReplyDelete25 was an incredibly hard birthday for me. I thought I would be married (or at least engaged) and owning houses or having these amazing careers like most of my friends. Turns out, things work out in the long run. I turned 27 last week and am engaged to an amazing guy and got a promotion at work a little over a year ago. I still don't own property or even lease something worthwhile (I'm in a studio in Houston), but I am happy. Just know things happen the way they are supposed to. What's right for everyone else isn't necessarily right for you.
ReplyDeleteYou need to have some sort of gathering! I've already bought you an adorable present!!! xoxo
ReplyDeleteps- having everything work out the exact way you planned it is boring and you my dear are not boring
Since you gave me some encouragement yesterday, here is mine for you: You are worth celebrating! Start sending those invitations out!
ReplyDeleteOn my 25th birthday I thought the same way, "oh my what have I been doing with life, I haven't accomplished anything I thought by this age". But I realized that I was putting too high of expectations on myself. All that matters is you are happy in your day to day life. Everything else will fall into place eventually. Everyone I know in their 30's has said that the 20's are the absolute hardest years. Like you said just try to be blessed for what you do have. I'm sure there are tons of people who wish they were in the same place you are in life.
ReplyDeleteOh yes! Love to see that you bought the Kate Spade invitations. That's the fabulous person that you are - the one who celebrates her life with people she loves!! xoxo
ReplyDeletebe supremely disappointed when you don't reach them.
ReplyDeleteWork from home India
Ah, I had never thought of it, 25 on the 25th (I was 24 on the 24th last year...). However, I am with u 100% thinking a little that 25 is a major milestone. HOWEVER, it is not old, and you and I have MANY great years ahead of us to achieve all we want.
ReplyDeleteAnd personally, I think you are my most fab friend, whom I adore!!!! PARTY TEDDI, PARTY!!!!!
i'm a capricorn also :) turning 21 on the 12th. reverse golden birthday.
ReplyDeletei wouldn't worry so much about being single. you're accomplished and seem to have a wonderful personality about you. when the time is right i'm sure you'll find your own Nice Jewish Boy.
Oh and for old time's sake:
"Look at me, I'm BBG
Lousy without and NJB
Wholesome and pink,
That's at least what they think!
I'm just a BBG!
Hey, you! Your'e not a Jew
I cannot go out with you!
You're a really nice guy,
but you don't wear a Chai!
I'm just a BBG!
Hey, you, AZA!
I was not brought up that way.
Keep yourself in your pants,
You can wait till Beau dance!
I'm just a BBG!"
I feel like when I was younger, I thought of 25 as much older than it is. I just turned 24 and I remember as kid thinking that was ancient and that my life would be all settled when I was in my 20s. I get anxious sometimes about not accomplishing all that I expected to, but we have plenty of time. Just think, you're way further on your book than me...I haven't started! It'll happen soon :)
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a wonderful birthday. I remember 25, (and single) and it was great. Life plans were not what I had hoped for at that time in my life. Fast forward one year - married with a new job. Fast forward 22 years - great wife and FOUR children.
ReplyDeleteLife has a way of catching up, I promise.
Always enjoy what you have.
TWJ
I too turn 25 this year (Apr28th) and let me tell you my 23rd and 24th years were the hardest of my life. Don't let anyone tell you there is no quarter life crisis because trust me I know a dark place. It took a long time (and a lot of therapy) to get through, but in the end you are stronger and you learn a lot. My 25th birthday is going to be all about having made it through the rest and celebrating the things to come. I am really proud for that, you should be too, enjoy your Golden b-day I am going to try to so the same for mine!
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