So I was disappointed to scroll down to the comments and see that a few users left comments calling the girls 'fat'.
You wanna know something? All of those commenters were women.
Then again, I was pleasantly surprised to see that the positive commentary far outweighed the negative. But it does bring up the age-old question: Why do women hate on other women?
Look, there are girls who I don't like and there are certainly girls who don't like me. But why can't we all leave it at that? Why put negative energy out there, why take the time to not only insult someone, but make sure they hear it?
Lena Dunham has a great quote on Girls about how there is nothing mean you could say about me that I haven't already thought of 30 minutes earlier. That sums it up. I've heard it all. That I'm ugly, that I'm fat, that I'm pathetic. Nothing new. And Lord knows I am far from perfect. But I just don't get why people - namely women, in this case - take the time and energy to actively hate on others. What does it honestly accomplish? What good did insulting the girls in that photo do? What was the point?
I think that sometimes the easiest way to bond with someone is to share gripes, to bitch about something or someone you both detest. It creates a common ground and I get it. I've done it. It can be funny and giggly and it evokes commonality and makes you feel like you're not the only one. But there is a line. And I don't let myself cross it anymore.
This year I have learned that you can't please everyone. And so I have quit trying. The world wouldn't be any fun without controversy. Life wouldn't be interesting if you didn't know the difference between like and dislike. But I do wish that satisfaction wasn't gained by knocking someone else down.
I have come to accept that there are things in life I will never understand, and this one remains at the top of the list.
And for the record: I own Skinnygirl Shapewear. A very cute lacy lingerie-like top that is so constructed the only way I can get it on my body is by stepping into it. It literally will not go over my head. It looks nice on but I look completely ridiculous putting it on and taking it off, defeating the entire 'lingerie' purpose. What can you do? I have to laugh.
Great post.
ReplyDeleteI fully agree - if you do not have anything nice to say to someone, then don't say it. It is best to just ignore the people one does not like or cannot get along with.
I love this post! Why do women/girls have to beat each other down when they should be the ones supporting each other the most? You don't have to like anyone but you also don't need to be cruel to anyone.
ReplyDeleteThis is so true! My husband has this saying, "every obnoxious act is a cry for help". If someone is being obnoxious and putting people down it means they are insecure and if putting others down it actually makes them feel better.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you! I've found that if someone is putting others down it's because they feel insecure about themselves.
ReplyDeleteI was just talking with my colleagues this morning about how easy it is for women to be mean to each other. We need to stick together!
ReplyDeleteI love this post! It's 110% true. The reason girls get a bad rap for drama is because WE create it and it needs to stop! If we don't support each other, no one will. #girlpower But seriously...
ReplyDeletePost of the year!! Not even exaggerating at all, it is so true that people, ok lets face it, WOMEN, can be downright cruel to each other.
ReplyDeleteWe have all been guilty of it from time to time, i am the first to admit it, but to bash people in a picture, REALLY?!?!
No one is perfect, in body or personality, we all have flaws, like Farrah said, its easier to find fault with others to help cope with your own insecurities.
I had a problem with a coworker a few years ago, reported her to HR for attitude and hostile environment.
Admittedly i said a lot of things to her that i truly regret and we have since mended fences and probably get along better now than we have in two years.
She still says and does a lot of things that are wrong and mean spirited, but it is what it is, cliche as it sounds. She wont change, but neither will I, love me or hate me, its ok, life goes on...
Like anything else, there is nothing at all wrong with just agreeing to disagree and get on with your life.
Very nicely said!
ReplyDeleteA friend recently posted on her Facebook wall about how JK Rowling said that the meanest thing a woman says to insult another is that she's fat. Too true. But is that all you've got? Don't you have something else to care about? It's frustrating.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! But then again...I love anything that gives props to Lena Dunham! Dang, that girl is awesome (and she's a kick ass writer too!)!
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